Not grown-up...yet

OK, now I am just convinced you gals are voting just to even out the scores and make things more confusing for me!! Haaa, kidding.

But all of a sudden there are some votes for Jake and Charlie...really?? What is up with that? I guess someone could really like one or both of those names, don't get me wrong, I mean there are people out there with those names so someone must like them. But all this time it has been a competition between Jacob and Samuel. Hmmm, now we just need a middle name!!!

Thanks so much for your thoughts and prayers over the weekend. The weekend turned out to be so much better than I could have anticipated. Despite having to run all over the place and feeling like there was no downtime or time to really do anything constructive around the house, it was good.

Saturday we went to a birthday party for Miss J's boyfriend (he was born 1 week before Miss J and already has an arranged marriage, he he). It was a long commute but had a nice time. Felt good to hang out with other parents and let the kids play. They had so much stinking fun in the water and sandbox...so cute.

Sunday, we passed on church but instead went out to breakfast and tried to run a few errands. I love going to breakfast with my hubby and daughter...makes me smile and feel like a family!! We then headed to Kiddieland. Miss J got a small nap (it really only took us about 45 minutes to get there and she fell asleep about 10 minutes into the ride). I was worried she was going to be a pill because she hadn't been sleeping that well at night (another story) and had threw a fit at H*ome D*epot earlier that morning...so I was prepared for a terror child and was not looking forward to walking around a theme park for hours in the heat, with my big belly and swollen feet and feeling exhausted myself because of lack of sleep. Not to mention, I was expecting her to be very clingy and not want to go on rides by herself and want mommy or daddy to go with her, etc...

To my pleasurable surprise...SHE HAD A STINKING BLAST!! And mommy barely had to do anything to put her in and take her out of the rides...Nana did everything. And Miss J...LOVED it. Loved the rides, loved all the kids, loved everything that was going on. She was such a grown up little angel. Not to mention it wasn't that hot and I did pretty good standing and handling the heat.

I have this picture embedded in my head of my little girl, riding these rides, looking around, with this content little smile on her face that seemed to say "So, this is life!!" She did eek with glee now and then, but this constant smirk on her face just made my day, month, and probably entire year!! It was a great day to spend with MIL, SIL, BIL, DH, and DD. I was happy we went and will post pictures as soon as I get them downloaded!!

Don't get me wrong, I was beat Sunday night and just wanted to lay down and sleep at 8pm, but didn't get too. I was expecting to hurt and feel swollen and yucky all Monday...but didn't. It was nice.

Except Monday morning, when I dropped off Miss J at school. I had a hormonal breakdown. When she went into the room, we found out Tess (who is this little girl from the infant room that Miss J kind of took over her wing and completely loves) was in the Tod room full time now. So when we came in, I told Miss J to go find Tess. She runs over to her and gives her a little hug...and I just lost it. I mean rolling tears. Just made me think of what a great big sis she is going to be for her brother. Then...the tell me that Miss J is now in the 2's classroom and no longer in the Tods room. Uh, what...no preparation for this? No notice that THIS was the week you were doing this? Uh...rolling tears again, and then I couldn't stop. I took her bag into her new room and stayed there for a little bit as I sobbed.

My little girl was growing up. She was riding rides by herself. She was realizing that life is pretty good sometimes. She was taking a little girl under her wing. She was moving up in the world to the next classroom. Ahhh...too much for one day. Oh, and I forgot to tell you that as we were walking out of the house that morning...she started to whistle. Yes...she was really whistling and not just blowing air out of her lips! What is going on with my little girl? She is growing up too fast.

But that changed really quick...

As I walked back into the other room, she was playing with her girlfriend, who was being a bit of a bully. Pushing her and telling her she couldn't play with the kitchen set. Miss J started to cry and ran over to me and wanted me to hold her and not leave. She wouldn't let me give her to the teacher and go watch me say bye bye from the window. Nope...crying hysterically at the top of her lungs while I drove away.

Yup...she still needs her mama. Not grown up quite yet...but I was scared for a little bit!!

So next Monday, Labor Day, we are having Miss J's 2nd birthday party. A Curious George birthday party none the less. That is the ONLY TV show she wants to watch...and could care less how many times she sees the same episode. So we are having family, and a few of Miss J's friends over. I am trying to do simple, no huge up do of food and activities...after all I am going to be 6-weeks shy of delivering another one of these child like things into the world!! So, simple, and straightforward. I am excited for Miss J. She has been experiencing all of her friends birthdays over the past weeks, and singing Happy Birthday and all that jazz. Now she has to get her hands around the fact that it is HER birthday!! She probably won't have a problem with that.

So, busy week...but exciting.

August 24th

Sunday is the 1st anniversary of the death of my Father in Law. My DH has been having a tough week (even though he has not expressed it in so many words outwardly...I know his heart pangs in side). So, in memoriam, we are going to KiddieLand on Sunday. I have never been there. But I guess Miss J will be the 3rd generation to go there before they close down for good in the fall. And then afterwards, to a often visited restaurant by the family. It will be an interesting day. I am not sure how DH is going to be, I am not sure how MIL or SIL is going to be. I very much dislike somber days and get togethers. But I am sure there will be much drinking - not by me - to off set that (Haaa!!!)

DH took his dad's Harley last weekend, rode it home and has ridden in a few times this week. I think it brings him some joy to have it sitting in the garage and able to ride it. I just wish I could ride it with him. Last September we had a "ride" with all his friends/family to remember him. Very powerful event. I wish I could come up with something that would honor FIL for DH. But I am sure just spending the day with family will help.

Have a great weekend.

Really??

This article just blows my mind.

Do people really forget about their children in the car? I guess I could see it if you are running around like a chicken with your head cut off, and the baby is sleeping and you are out of routine for your day, thought you dropped the kid off at daycare, go into work, get so busy and too busy to even think "did I forget anything", and then come out after work and realize she had been in there ALL FREAKING DAY!! IN 90 DEGREE FREAKING WEATHER!!!

I really have a hard time grasping this concept...but obviously it happens, to well meaning, christian, loving people.

Please pray for them.

Look at how stinking small she was!!!

These are pics of Miss J when she was born, almost 2 years ago. Gosh, she was such a peanut and so fragile. I can't believe we are having another one of these!!

And look at her at just a couple of months old...gosh...crazy how much she has changed since then!!

And just a month or so ago...

Not Cooperating

Nope, BP2 didn't want to cooperate with us last night during the ultrasound. I swear he was asleep. The ONE time I wished he were moving and kicking...he wasn't. He was face down (toward my back), and head down...like he was ready to come into this world. He has been that way for quite some time now. I feel and see him often times move his butt to one side or another. I can tell when he is in an odd position...I am not comfortable at all!! But last night, yea, he just wanted to sleep, face down, head down, probably dreaming about entering this world soon!!

So, we got only a few black an whites of his face (really not good at all...it was through the back of his head so he looked a little freaky), his feet (again, ackward looking), and his spine and head (which was the best because it was the side view that we could see over and over).

My heart was a little broken. I really wanted to see my baby boy's face. I wanted to see those hands and toes and see if he was sucking his thumb or yawning. But nothing. Couldn't even shake him into a different position.

In a way, I feel like this is God's way of saying, "This is my surprise to you." No matter what he looks like I will love him and think he is the most adorable thing in the world (besides my daughter of course). It is His way of saying "Have faith in me that he will be as beautiful as you could imagine." But I still wanted to see him.

Everything is measuring right on track, everything looks to be happy and healthy, I just couldn't see his face. And in all reality, healthy is all I should care about. Heck, many women don't even have the chance to have an u/s, let alone a 3-d one. Many women just have to wait until their child is born to see if they are healthy, have any defects, is a boy or a girl!! So what the heck am I complaining about???

Just bummed, I guess. But only 7 1/2 more weeks and I will know, and see him, and adore him! And yes, we are sure it is a "him". She saw his testies!! Haaa, I said testies!!! Wow, something I am going to have to get used to. A pee pee on the outside!!

I will try to scan the pictures and post them, but my mom has the scanner and I don't have much luck getting them in viewable form...will try though.

Have a good night!!

Overwhelmed

Yup. That is me. This weekend. Today. Yesterday. I just feel overwhelmed with too much to do and anxious along with nervous just adds to it.

I actually had a dream last night that the baby's arm reached along side my rib cage toward my back and you could see his arm and hand through my skin. Like an alien or something. Uh, me, no, I am not overwhelmed at all!!

We got the office stuff moved out of the room into DH's bedroom (which is now cramped and full of crap with no organization to it). And we got the crib and rocker set up in the room for the baby. Miss J saw the crib and wanted to be in it, sleep in it, put her babies to sleep in it...we kept tyring to tell her it was for her baby brother, but she wouldn't listen. Now we have to get the blinds up, move the changing table (which is a whole other situation we haven't figured out yet whether we get a new one that has a dresser since the dresser and changing table won't fit in the room, or if we just get an organizer for the closet with some drawers and stuff??) Oh, and we have to move the cat box out of there...DH is NOT looking forward to having the cat box in "his" room. He is putting that off as much as possible. He hates that box, he actually very much dislikes the cat too. He keeps hoping the 13yr old cat will kick the bucket soon...but she is still moping around as healthy (and large!!) as ever. Oh, and we have to get DH to clean out one of his closets so I can put the stuff from the office closet in there...or in the attic, I guess it could go there. But we need to get the closet opened up so we can put an organizer in there, if that is what we are going to do, or at least so I can put his clothes and stuff in HIS room, not in Miss J's.

That experience, of getting the crib up and the stuff moved, really hit me. We only have 8-weeks left. OMGoodness. What are we going to do with two kids?? We really don't have the room. We barely have the time now for one. How are we going to get into a different groove, and what is that groove going to be and how is it going to look. I can't even get past what to do with his dresser/changing table situation, how can I even THINK about a groove with two kids. Getting them ready, feeding them, sleeping...Ahhhh.

The only comfort I have right now is knowing that I most definitely felt the same way about this time when I was pregnant with Miss J. Scared about what life was going to look like. Did I have everything ready, in the right place, the right stuff, the right books. Did I know how our routine would be? Nope...I was probably just as much of a mess with her as I am now. So, a little comfort that brings.

Miss J is still being difficult. Not wanting to let go of mommy. The last two mornings I have left her at school screaming and crying for me. She didn't want me to go. Last night, even though DH picked her up from school and spent some time with her, she wouldn't let him read to her or put her to bed. She threw a kicking and screaming fit until I came in. Even then she wasn't completely going to bed (and it was 8:30!!), she wanted me to stay in there and not to leave. This is all new. Like she is afraid I am going to leave and not come back. Then she wakes up at least once in the night, the past few nights, crying and scared and it is really hard to get her to calm down and get back to sleep. I don't know, combination of things that are affecting her...but she better get over this quick because it is only causing me more anxiety about "how are we going to do this!!"

On a good note. I had a Dr. appt this morning and it showed I hadn't gained any weight!! Yea. That is good news to me because the last time I went in it showed I had gained like 5lbs in two weeks. I knew that wasn't right. I think I was retaining a lot of water and had eaten something really salty that day. So today's weight seemed a little better to me. And I love how all the doctors tell you how great you look!! I think they tell that to all their patients...but it sounds pretty genuine, and I will take it. Makes you feel pretty good about yourself even if it is just for a few minutes.

Tonight, we get to see BP2 on ultrasound again. I am so excited. It may overwhelm me a little more, but at least we get to see his precious face and body, get to see him move all over, and see how big he is. I think this is going to be a big boy, with some long legs and hands/feet. I also think he will be a week or so early...so tonight we should have a better idea of how he is measuring.

Lots going on this week. Two weeks until Miss J's birthday. This weekend is packed with another 2nd birthday and the anniversary of my FIL's death (which we will be celebrating at Kiddie Land with the family). Next weekend is Labor day with Miss J's birthday, then it is the home stretch of Baby Boy!! Almost there...I still don't think we are ready...but are you really ever??

Have a great week, I may update again later with results from the u/s...

Tagged

Thank you, Annie, for tagging me to list 7 random facts about myself. Y'all know I RARELY do these, but thought it may be quite therapeutic to remember some quirky things about me that you may not know.

1. I played the French Horn in Grade School and into Jr. High. Not really into High School as I was also a Cheerleader, it really wasn't cool to be in Band AND in Cheerleading.

2. I planned our wedding in 3-months. We had been dating for 3 1/2 years and were both starting to age in our early 30's and really saw no reason at all to wait a year to get married. We were ready and didn't want a big wedding so why prolong it. It was the best wedding ever, I would not change a thing, and I am constantly comparing what we did to other weddings...and no comparison!! - course, I am a bit biased on that...ha!

3. Matthew McConaughey used to be me "dream man". Ever since college, especially when I found out a college mate of mine went to a wedding where the bride was some how related to him...and I knew that could be my "in" to meet the guy. But, in the past years, that has changed. He has turned a bit too "green" for me. Too down to earth. Doesn't really appeal to me...his looks and southern accent he can play still do...don't get me wrong, I still can woo over him. But, my new man lately has been Jeffrey Donovan, from Burn Notice on USA. Have y'all seen him. Mmmm, something about the way he holds himself, he is just darn right cute!! Course, it could all be an act since I have only really seen him in the TV series...but I will watch it every week just to see him!!.

4. I LOVE LOVE LOVE my sunroof in my truck. I will never buy another vehicle without it. In fact, I will probably wear this one out before the truck gets worn out. I open and close it at least 2-3 times a day. All the way open, not just vent. Of course if it is raining or cold, I only vent it...there is something about the sun on my skin and the air circulating through the vehicle. Ahhh.

5. I drink at least 64 oz of water a day...most days more when you include the hot tea and iced tea and water I drink at night. Probably ends up being more like 85+ oz a day. So when those diet gurus say "drink more water to aid in weight loss", uh, how much more. I float as it is.

6. Chocolate and Peanut Butter. My favorite combination of ANYTHING!!

7. I used to be quite the "hip house junkie" when I was in High School and College, and even a bit after College. Dance clubs, raves, bass tubes in the car so I could pound the bass in the music. I was a little party girl. That changed once I matured a bit and realized I wouldn't find a very good future (job, husband, family) going that direction. It was fun while it lasted, I still turn up the mix music now and then to reminisce about those days!!

Now, to tag some others.
Mrs. BFW
Jodi
Kelley
Christina
Kimmy
Emma's Mom
ANYONE!!